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.In fact, she slapped me hard across the face and told me to stop lying in an attempt to get attention.She said that we all missed Daddy, but that was no reason for me to make up ridiculous stories.I have grown to hate my mother.She was only concerned about him, saying a man’s pride and reputation were sometimes all he had and I could destroy them both with my lies.She actually accused me of trying to steal her husband away with my youth and called me several vile names, my own mother.I thought she loved me, but I was wrong.Not only did she not believe me about the sexual abuse, but also she didn’t even step in when he was physically abusing me, telling me instead that it was my fault and that I had somehow asked for it.I shake my head at the dirty memories, my empty stomach curdling, and I rush to the bathroom to vomit.I’m on my hands and knees on the tile floor, my body trembling and my stomach clenching from the memories wreaking havoc on my body.I manage to pull myself up onto my feet, my legs trembling in fatigue.I rinse my mouth out and brush my teeth all over again, getting the vile taste out of my mouth.I remove my wet pajamas and pull all the damp bedding off of the bed, putting a clean set of sheets on before dumping all the dirty stuff into a pile at the door.I guess I’ll have to make a trip to the Laundromat this weekend to do my laundry.I climb back into bed and try to steer my thoughts to better things, like memories of Daddy or Grams.It’s getting harder and harder for me to remember things like his smiling face or how he smelled, and Grams, I can barely remember the wrinkles around her eyes and how deep they got when she smiled.Grams loved smiling and she said the wrinkles around her eyes were her proof that she was living a happy life.It hurts my heart and makes me feel hollow thinking that I’m forgetting them, especially Daddy.I can’t forget him, I just can’t.He’s the only bit of positive from my past.I fall back into a fitful sleep, trying to picture his smiling face in my mind.***I wake up about fifteen minutes before my alarm and I’m thankful for the extra time.I get ready as fast as I can and throw all my laundry into the bag, so I can grab it quickly and head to the Laundromat at the end of my shift.I also want to head home and see if I can sneak in to grab some more of my things without Mama and Mike seeing.I’m stupid for thinking they’ve even kept anything of mine, especially after this much time has passed, but I have to try.Fear has kept me away all this time, but it’s time to face it head on.At least then I’ll know.I have a large box of photos of Daddy that are an absolute must-have, and while I didn’t have many clothes, there are several things that I should grab while I can.Knowing Mama, she probably threw my things out long ago; after all, it’s been well over a year since I left.I repeat my morning routine, calling out my daily greeting to Mr.Roland and our short order cook, all while getting the coffee started.I must look an absolute mess, because Mr.Roland pours a cup of coffee and hands it directly to me.I take my first sip and love the bold flavor as it explodes on my tongue.I think I’ve found a new obsession.Why haven’t I tried this before? I gulp my coffee quickly so I can rush out to the floor and start letting our patrons in.“Morning, Roger,” I call out with a smile.I get a small smile in return as he slides into his seat at the counter.“Morning, Doll,” he says.“Have you given any more thought to that job offer?” I did some research while I was at the library.I’m twenty-one, so in our state I can legally strip for him and serve liquor or consume alcohol.I hope the offer still stands, as I am very interested.I’m tired of being broke.I don’t know if I have it in me, but I need to survive and living on a cot in the back room of a diner isn’t what I had in mind for my life.“Yeah I have,” I say under my breath.“I’m twenty-one.Are you still interested in hiring me?” I watch his face carefully, trying to see if he’s leaving me any clues as to how he might respond.“For sure, Doll.The job is yours whenever you’re ready to take it.Just call that number on the card or let me know when you want to start when I pop in for my coffee and my daily fix of those gorgeous dimples.” At his answer I beam, showing off the dimples that he’s referring to [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
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.In fact, she slapped me hard across the face and told me to stop lying in an attempt to get attention.She said that we all missed Daddy, but that was no reason for me to make up ridiculous stories.I have grown to hate my mother.She was only concerned about him, saying a man’s pride and reputation were sometimes all he had and I could destroy them both with my lies.She actually accused me of trying to steal her husband away with my youth and called me several vile names, my own mother.I thought she loved me, but I was wrong.Not only did she not believe me about the sexual abuse, but also she didn’t even step in when he was physically abusing me, telling me instead that it was my fault and that I had somehow asked for it.I shake my head at the dirty memories, my empty stomach curdling, and I rush to the bathroom to vomit.I’m on my hands and knees on the tile floor, my body trembling and my stomach clenching from the memories wreaking havoc on my body.I manage to pull myself up onto my feet, my legs trembling in fatigue.I rinse my mouth out and brush my teeth all over again, getting the vile taste out of my mouth.I remove my wet pajamas and pull all the damp bedding off of the bed, putting a clean set of sheets on before dumping all the dirty stuff into a pile at the door.I guess I’ll have to make a trip to the Laundromat this weekend to do my laundry.I climb back into bed and try to steer my thoughts to better things, like memories of Daddy or Grams.It’s getting harder and harder for me to remember things like his smiling face or how he smelled, and Grams, I can barely remember the wrinkles around her eyes and how deep they got when she smiled.Grams loved smiling and she said the wrinkles around her eyes were her proof that she was living a happy life.It hurts my heart and makes me feel hollow thinking that I’m forgetting them, especially Daddy.I can’t forget him, I just can’t.He’s the only bit of positive from my past.I fall back into a fitful sleep, trying to picture his smiling face in my mind.***I wake up about fifteen minutes before my alarm and I’m thankful for the extra time.I get ready as fast as I can and throw all my laundry into the bag, so I can grab it quickly and head to the Laundromat at the end of my shift.I also want to head home and see if I can sneak in to grab some more of my things without Mama and Mike seeing.I’m stupid for thinking they’ve even kept anything of mine, especially after this much time has passed, but I have to try.Fear has kept me away all this time, but it’s time to face it head on.At least then I’ll know.I have a large box of photos of Daddy that are an absolute must-have, and while I didn’t have many clothes, there are several things that I should grab while I can.Knowing Mama, she probably threw my things out long ago; after all, it’s been well over a year since I left.I repeat my morning routine, calling out my daily greeting to Mr.Roland and our short order cook, all while getting the coffee started.I must look an absolute mess, because Mr.Roland pours a cup of coffee and hands it directly to me.I take my first sip and love the bold flavor as it explodes on my tongue.I think I’ve found a new obsession.Why haven’t I tried this before? I gulp my coffee quickly so I can rush out to the floor and start letting our patrons in.“Morning, Roger,” I call out with a smile.I get a small smile in return as he slides into his seat at the counter.“Morning, Doll,” he says.“Have you given any more thought to that job offer?” I did some research while I was at the library.I’m twenty-one, so in our state I can legally strip for him and serve liquor or consume alcohol.I hope the offer still stands, as I am very interested.I’m tired of being broke.I don’t know if I have it in me, but I need to survive and living on a cot in the back room of a diner isn’t what I had in mind for my life.“Yeah I have,” I say under my breath.“I’m twenty-one.Are you still interested in hiring me?” I watch his face carefully, trying to see if he’s leaving me any clues as to how he might respond.“For sure, Doll.The job is yours whenever you’re ready to take it.Just call that number on the card or let me know when you want to start when I pop in for my coffee and my daily fix of those gorgeous dimples.” At his answer I beam, showing off the dimples that he’s referring to [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]